With my husband gone on a backpacking trip, my little boy gets to sleep with me (with three in the bed it gets too crowded for me and my claustrophobia kicks in!).
But with the two of us it is so cozy. When he sleeps with me he always wants a hand or a foot on me for reassurance- “Mommy is still there!”- which probably comes from when he was younger (and smaller!) and used to sleep with us all the time and I would always keep a hand on him.
When we sleep together, falling asleep is never a problem as we cuddle together until we drift off in peaceful harmony.
His three o'clock feeding is just a continuation of the harmony as his gentle tugs on my shirt prompts me to roll over (without even properly waking up) and when he is finished he simply pulls away and falls back to sleep. So in tune with each other.
In the night if I wake up I listen to his breathing, tuck him in a little more, and relish the sweet moment of slumbering baby.
In the morning, my awakening is a little abrupt as my early-riser bats at me with his hands and pommels me with his feet with ever increasing vigor until I open an eye and then he gives me a radiant smile! “Ah ha! She is awake! Nope! Her eye is closed again- let me try again!” When I finally resign myself to my fate, he just wiggles with excitement! “Yes! I get to play with Mommy!” As I look into the two sparkling blue eyes and his toothy grin (with his tongue sticking out) I can't resist giving him a kiss on each plump cheek and a nibble under his chin in just the spot where he especially likes it.
It is such a precious time together. Mother and son so attuned to each other.
I miss my husband but also cherish these moments.
“Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?” (Ecclesiastes 4:11)
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